


Fragmented

by jung_eunkyung



Series: Love, The Elixir of Life: Hyunwoo and Kihyun Throughout the Years [2]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 07:56:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12601868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jung_eunkyung/pseuds/jung_eunkyung
Summary: Kihyun loses a part of himself, and then gets it back.





	Fragmented

**Author's Note:**

> This work was inspired by the actor Kim Joo Hyuk's untimely death. He, along with the rest of the 2 Days & 1 Night: Season 3 cast have been one of the few people who pulled me through my depressive and suicidal episodes a few years back, and for that I am always grateful. It's ironic that the same man would make me cry so much, but I suppose that's life. At this point all I feel is this numbness, much like Kihyun here. I hoped writing this would be a sort of outlet to help me feel better, but I don't feel any less destructive. It doesn't make me feel any better that his accident was exactly like mine that I suffered a few months back, and and yet I'm still here breathing and he isn't. 
> 
> Anyway, this fic is set in the same universe as You Are My Life. This is the part where it was mentioned that Hyunwoo and Kihyun took a break in their relationship during college, but then got back together after a while? This is a small excerpt from there. It can also be read as a stand-alone.
> 
> As much as Kudos is welcomed, constructive criticism is a lot more appreciated. Enjoy!

Kihyun wakes up that morning on the right side of the bed. The sun is up, but not enough that the rays hurt his eyes. The sky is a lovely blue and he can hear birds chirping outside his slightly ajar window. It’s a pleasant sound. He doesn’t have class until ten, so he has plenty of time to get a hearty breakfast and read up before leaving. All in all, it’s a good day.

Why, then, does he feel like crying?

 

Kihyun gets to his class ten minutes early. He fiddles with his phone and looks over his calendar to note his next test dates so that he can plan when to study for them until his professor calls for silence. She seems to be in a jolly mood today, and as a result she doesn’t talk at the rate of a bullet train. Kihyun’s notes even look legible enough that he doesn’t have to rewrite them.

Kihyun is still miserable.

 

Kihyun meets up with Changkyun for lunch. He doesn’t ask about Jooheon, and Changkyun doesn’t tell. They have dinner in silence, occasionally with Changkyun’s weird jokes making an appearance. Kihyun chuckles, but it doesn’t sound convincing, not even to himself. Changkyun sighs, and Kihyun feels bad for making the man worry.

But he feels so weak, weak enough to not even be able muster a good laugh.

 

Kihyun’s day goes on with two more back-to-back classes, and then a group discussion. It’s almost 6 by the time he’s done, and once again he’s grateful that he lives so near campus. He quickly walks back to his dorm and flops onto the bed. Normally he would plug in his earphones and doze off, but these days music doesn’t seem to be his talisman anymore.

Nothing seems to fill that void in his heart anymore.

 

It’s nearly 9, and Kihyun has been lying in bed staring at the ceiling for the past three hours. He knows he should get some studying done, or at least go and have dinner. Normally he would never let himself be this unproductive, but somehow he can’t seem to remind himself the reason why he has to work so hard.

He thinks it’s probably because it isn’t there anymore.

 

Kihyun falls in and out of consciousnes that night, waking up during odd hours. He can’t seem to stay asleep. He thinks it’s just because he’s overworked himself, and his brain can’t seem to take a breather, as if it’s on caffeine. (It doesn’t occur to him that maybe, just maybe, he doesn’t like what he sees in his dreams.) Changkyun is fast asleep, but he wake easily so Kihyun doesn’t do anything to occupy his mind.

The only thing Kihyun feels like doing involves tears, but he’s been doing so much of that lately anyway.

 

At some point though, exhaustion overtakes him and Kihyun gets some proper shut eye. Barely a couple of hours later there is a series of frantic knocks on the door, and Kihyun wakes. He looks over at his roommate’s bed. No one’s there. Figuring it was Changkyun, Kihyun rises slowly and goes to open the door. Normally he would nag at the poor boy until it gets on his nerves, but today Kihyun doesn’t feel up to it.

The door opens, and it’s not Changkyun.

 

Due to his half-asleep state (or perhaps his full-pathetic state), Kihyun doesn’t note just who’s there. He just opens the door and trudges back to bed. It isn’t until the person has their arms around him, their broad chest pressing against his back that he realizes just who he let in. Kihyun’s eyes widen, and he pushes against the firm hold Hyunwoo has on him, stopping only when he feels water on his neck.

Kihyun breaks down.

 

They don’t say anything to each other, letting their actions speak instead. In the midst of warm lips, light touches and the taste of salty tears, Kihyun can feel himself become whole again.


End file.
